Face Plant McGee

The old adage remains true: you've got to fall dramatically out of a chair, onto your face, before you can sit in said chair and pretend it's a sit-n-spin.

Actually, now that I think about it, these development charts that we go through at Max's check-ups have got it sort of wrong. Rather than asking us how many blocks a Max can stack (A question which, by the way, has now turned me into a neurotic block-stacker whenever Max is around. Oedipus-ly enough, the boy does seem to take great pleasure in knocking down my block towers. He's not much of builder (poor development!) but, man, daddy'll get a nice stack of 8 or 9 blocks going on and Max will laugh loudly and chop it down (with the edge of his hand). I'm never sure if I should laugh along with him or run away, crying, to tell Katie what he's done. Seriously, how can anyone expect me to not screw this kid up?)

Anyyyway, these charts, they should ask, "Can your child struggle onto the couch? How long does it take? How many times does he grunt while struggling onto couch? Does the child fall off of couch? After how long? On a scale of 1-10, how willful has your child become? Can he open the screen door and walk out on his own?" These are the important questions, not whether or not he can stack three or more blocks. There's nothing like the hiss and soft "thump" of the screen door closing to let you know your kid has made a significant developmental leap.

UPDATE: Perhaps it was a mistake to write this post. Today Max had a window fall shut on his hand. Shortly thereafter, he fell down a flight of stairs. He's fine. I just want to know where to mark this on the growth chart.